Writing

Writing - Paste your LONG WEEKEND writing below. Read it and the rubric below to self assess your work. DO NOT EDIT YET. Use comments to make notes about what you need to do next.

On the day of friday after school i went straight home to get ready to go to the airport because my dad was going back to Australia to work for his job .  And the family that went to see him of was my mum Ruth two sisters Erina , Suzie two brothers Iki , Jeremiah cousin but more like a sister Amelia and me Whitney. When we arrived to the airport my mum said that if we could hop out of the car and go wait on the seats for them and we said “sure” . So four of us hopped out of the car and two went with my mum to go look for a parking space . Once they came back to us we all went inside the airport and booked my dad's tickets for his trip to Australia When his tickets were booked my mum and dad said should we go get something to eat and we all said YES please so we decided what we wanted and we were getting Mcdonald’s but a family pack. Once we all had our little feed we were having the last laugh , last picture, huge but not a tear. Before his flight was nearly up my mum ruth and my dad Darrel went outside the airport and had a little privacy to themselves but did not have a clue what they were saying . So when we all saw that we thought that they look cute together so we decided to stay up the moving think and sat inside the airport for a while and we were going to play the sausage  game but my older brother Jeremiah said that’ that game is rude for yous so we played a different  game that he had learnt on his own with his boys. When my dad and my mum were finished having their privacy they came back up the moving think and saw us play the game and said come on we have to go now and it was like we all made a sad noise.  So when my dad’s flight was bage on we all said goodbye  we all also gave him the longest hug ever that he was leaving  and he also said if we can Skype him over there and my mum said of course.   When he had already left we all were going up to the look out up top of the airport but it was closed because something was happening and we saw the moving thing that had be stopped . So my mum said that i guess we have to go up to there other one on a driveway beside the airport . On our way there we had waited there for quite a while because I think that they were waiting for the other people to hop on. When we waited there for a while we finally saw his plane up in the air and we all waved a sad goodbye . THE END

Writing Rubric - Highlight the level that you think you have reached for each of the criteria (ideas/vocab/text structure/sentence structure)

	1	2	3
Ideas	Ideas don’t have details to describe, and need more information.	3 main ideas Using describing words to tell what happened.	3 or more main ideas. Using describing words to tell what happened. Describing why or how each idea is important.
Vocab/ Words	No descriptive words Not many specific words to add detail.	Uses some technical/specific words but could use more Use a few describing words (adjectives) but could use more	Using specific words to add detail. eg. Rotunda instead of meeting place Use descriptive words (adjectives) to create help  a picture in our mind with our words.
Text Structure 5W’s = Where What Why When Who	Uses some of the 5W’s & How Uses some time linking words. May have a short conclusion with feelings.	Introduction has 5W’s and How Paragraph’s start with connectives time linking words. Conclusion only has the feeling.	Use a ‘Hook in’ to grab the reader’s attention. Introduction has 5W’s & How to quickly describe the recount. Paragraphs start with connectives (time linking words) Conclusion repeats the main ideas, and how we felt or liked most..
Sentence Structure	Capitals and full stops not always used. Some sentences make sense, some past and present tense not used right. Sentences carry on too long and should have more full stops. Sentences start the same way.	Sentences start with capitals and end with full stops. Most sentences make sense. Has some compound sentences Sentences carry on too long and should have more full stops. Some sentence starters are repeated.	Sentences start with capital letters and end with full stops. Sentences make sense and use past and present tense correctly. Use FANBOYS to make compound sentences. Sentences start differently (not the same starting) to add interest.